If you want to play an infinite game, you better like the rules

Hi,

This week, I’ve been doing a lot of soul-searching, thinking about what I want to do for the long haul. This was sparked by an episode of The Steve Magness Podcast, where he talked about the role of a coach.

If you're tuned into American basketball (and let’s be honest, why would you be?), there's a growing narrative that elite high school players lack the fundamental skills needed to compete globally.

There are plenty of theories as to why this is happening. I think it comes down to this: youth and college coaches typically offer athletes three things—a platform, winning, and lessons. Most coaches can deliver one of those, good coaches can give you two, and great coaches provide all three. Think Coach K at Duke or, more recently, UConn’s Coach Hurley.

The issue? For many all-world talents, lessons are the last thing they want. Platforms and winning are far more enticing than being grilled on the small details.

The podcast (which was actually about running, not basketball) highlighted that a coach’s primary role is to teach their athletes how to be successful. But it’s not just about the lessons; it’s about how you teach them—your pedagogy.

Pedagogy focuses less on what you teach and more on how you teach it. This matters because the lessons you thought were correct ten years ago might turn out to be wrong. But if you know how to teach, you can refine the lessons and continue fostering growth.

When you master your pedagogy, you’re not reliant on perfect lessons.

So what does this have to do with my purpose?

Lately, the idea of the "infinite game" has been on my mind.

Quick definitions:

• Finite game: A game designed to win.

• Infinite game: A game designed to be perpetually continued.

I have two infinite games I want to play.

• One is to be a loving spouse (making good headway there, I think).

• The other is to spend my life teaching.

Learning, for me, is ultimately about turning around and teaching someone else. It’s just how I’m wired.

How do finite games fit into infinite ones?

Finite games are like keeping your eye on the ball in baseball. The larger game involves more than a single pitch, but in that moment, you focus entirely on that pitch.

Finite games give us a timeline to achieve something that serves the ultimate infinite game.

Without finite games, we’re left not just spending effort doing the thing, but also expending energy wondering how much longer we’ll have to keep doing it.

Gilbert Arenas tells a story about working out with a Navy SEAL. The SEAL had him start running at some ungodly hour, but never said how long they’d be running. Arenas kept thinking they were done, only for the SEAL to push them further. It wasn’t just the running—it was not knowing how long that broke him.

We need parameters to make progress make sense.

One last thought on infinite games

If you’re going to play an infinite game, you’d better like the rules.

Rules for finite games ensure fairness. Rules for infinite games help you keep playing. If you hate those rules, you won’t be able to keep going.

The Hero’s Journal

This week’s story is more philosophical than historical.

A few months into our lease, Nick and I sat in our conference room/kitchen talking about our goals for the business. We were on opposite sides of a big question:

• Do we try to sell the business?

• Or run it for the rest of our lives?

Obviously, a lot has to go right for either extreme, but suspend disbelief for a moment.

I leaned toward selling at some point. After a long conversation about hopes, dreams, and financial outcomes, I spoke with my stepmom Madonna, who asked me a rhetorical question that completely shifted my thinking:

"What’s different about what you do tomorrow if you're selling the business in 18 months or running it for the rest of your life?"

The answer? Not much.

The things you need to do to make a company worth selling are often the same things you need to give a company a long runway. Like flying a plane, small adjustments over time lead to dramatic changes in direction.

We started focusing on releases as finite games to help us see the bigger picture—our infinite game of building a business worth selling or making it our life’s work.

The lesson? Before wallowing about things not being perfect, look at your tasks and ask, how different is this day from a day in the career you want? Probably not much.

Atypical

The idea of pedagogy resonates with me when thinking about Trey and Atypical.

Trey isn’t just learning drills or rehab routines to be a better basketball player—he’s mastering an entire teaching medium. Teaching in person is one thing. Teaching through video in a way that’s approachable to people worldwide? That’s a whole different skill set.

This week, Trey said something really nice:

"I started making content because I wanted a library I could show my kids—so they’d see how I built the life they have."

That’s an infinite game.

Reading

I’m reading Do Hard Things by Steve Magness. I know I’ve been fanboying about him a lot lately, but his work is just really great. Highly recommend the podcast too.

Coffee

Is coffee a luxury? Casey and I had this debate this week. For me, coffee is part of my daily routine—a commodity rather than a luxury. What do you think?

Conclusion

I’m super inspired by the idea of pedagogy—practicing teaching, not just focusing on the lessons themselves.

Final thought: This week, I had a cavity filled, and the dentist didn’t tell me how long it would take. I sat there wallowing, trying to figure out when it would end. In that chair, I was sure I’d die of old age.

Anywho… Have a great weekend. Check out my Instagram for this newsletter.

Kyle