Life is a Trip

Hi, 

This week is a bit of a false peak, well it’s actually 100% a false peak. You see, I mislabeled newsletter #37 as Newsletter #38, so this is actually newsletter #51. 

What caused me to realize this? 

Well when I set out to write a newsletter, my goal was to write weekly for a year, so for those of you keen eyed mayans out there, a year has 52 weeks. So this was going to be my 52nd newsletter, thus meeting my goal. 

Well it’s number 51, which actually inspired the topic for today’s newsletter. 

I am calling it: Life is a Trip - False Peaks, Requisite Fuel, and Obstacles. 

Let’s explore. 

False Peaks 

I have been thinking a lot about false peaks this week for two reasons: I have been reflecting on the idea of Infinite Games and the book The Second Mountain. 

For those of you who do not know, a false peak refers to when you are nearing the top of a climb or hike, and you think you can see the end, but once you arrive, you realize that wasn’t the end and there is more to go. 

The Infinite Game is something I covered a while ago, but as a refresher, the idea is that the goal of an infinite game is to keep the game going. Therefore, when playing an infinite game, a false peak shouldn’t exist. The idea of an end is antithetical to an infinite game. 

The Second Mountain is a book written by David Brooks. He essentially outlines what happens once you crest the mountain of accomplishment. What you see is a second mountain on the horizon, a mountain that is paved with all of the things that actually matter to you. Not a false peak, but a new peak, one that matters to you. 

As someone who sees writing a newsletter as repetitions for the goal of becoming a better writer, so that I can continue to write more, the idea of 52 weeks of newsletter writing should be something that comes across as inconsequential. 

But it matters to me. 

One of the difficulties I have struggled with when it comes to writing, and even in a broader professional sense is proof. 

I do not feel as though I have proven to myself that I am who I say I am. 

Therefore, 52 newsletters shows that, I may not reach this lofty idea of who I think I may be, but that inner critic can’t say that I am not someone who publishes a newsletter every week for a year. 

It’s the small wins in life. 

Requisite Fuel 

As you may or may not know, I listen to a fair share of the Modern Wisdom podcast. Over the past few episodes this idea has come up: Don’t Copy the Results, Copy the Rise. 

In our modern environment, there is more information than ever about people who appear to be doing better than you at the thing that you want to be doing. When I was a kid playing youth soccer, the coach would always say that there is someone out there who is better than you, and there is someone out there better than them. 

There is always a bigger fish. 

The only difference between now and then, is that you can now go on your phone and find every single fish that is bigger and badder than you are. 

There is a face to a name. And in our weaker moments, we can allow ourselves to not start because there is no point if that person is already doing it at that level. 

Then in even weaker moments, we try to emulate their life… now. They are doing their rounds talking about all of their hacks to optimize their life or the things that they do.

You aren’t on their level, doing the things they do won’t make you better at the level you are at, it may prepare you to be good once you reach their level, but if you want to get to their level you have to emulate what they did to get there, not what they do once they arrived. 

So why is this requisite fuel? To get the engine in motion you have to use the fuel you have, not the fuel that you want. 

Maybe you are trying to prove people wrong, or you are vying for love that you think you deserve. These reasons are by no means powerful enough to sustain you through the entirety of your trip, but they may just be strong enough to get you to start. 

For example, if you are stranded 250 miles away from nowhere, and you are sitting behind the wheel of a Ferrari that is out of gas. You won’t hesitate to put low octane gas in the engine if it was your only means to get out of the situation. 

But once you get to a better place, you aren’t going to keep putting low octane fuel in the Ferrari, you are going to get it serviced and give it what it needs to have longevity. 

You have to use the fuel that you have, not the fuel that you want. 

Just don’t stay there, just because a fuel worked, doesn’t mean it will always work.

Obstacles

Recently, I have been making the drive to my mom’s house weekly. It’s not too bad, maybe an hour and fifteen minutes on a good day. Even though I know the drive very well now, I still always use google maps, to make sure there isn’t a faster way to get there with traffic and all the other things that come with long drives. 

I have noticed that I haven’t been able to get there faster than google maps says. I can drive 5,10,15 mph faster for stretches and the time doesn’t budge. 

Today, as I made the drive, I had a revelation. The impact of the speed I drive on the freeway pails in comparison to the length of a stop light. I can make an incredible time, and then sit at a random stop light for an extra 3 minutes and I arrive at my destination 5 minutes later than google maps told me. 

When I was able to break free from my frustration, I was able to have a pretty valuable insight.

The stop light is an enemy towards my goal of getting there fast, but is an ally in getting me there. 

The stop light doesn’t exist to stop me, it exists to facilitate safe driving conditions. The goal of driving isn’t to get there the fastest… it's to get there. 

The number of times that I have gotten frustrated in my life that I am not getting where I need to go as quickly as I want to is innumerable. But as I reflect, was the goal to get there as soon as I could or was the goal to get there? 

Maybe obstacles were actually the lessons I needed to learn, so that when I do arrive, I am ready for whatever the destination requires of me. 

As I said a bit ago, it is all a part of it. 

Tie it all up

This last year has been a really tough one. 

In May, I stepped away from The Hero’s Journal, I started a new job, I left that job, I started another new job, and the whole time I have been second guessing myself.

For the story of my life, The Hero’s Journal has been the longest and most impactful “trip” that I have been on to date. It was filled with false peaks, requisite fuels, and obstacles. 

The thing that you don’t know when you are barreling down the freeway trying to get there 3 minutes early, is that the goal of the trip was to prepare you for the next one. 

So getting this point has always been more important than getting to this point… quickly. 

Happy Newsletter #51  

Hopefully next week is actually #52

Kyle